God is Present.

      I wanted to share a very significant event with the world that happened on your average, every-day Sunday. 

     I go to Harris Creek Baptist Church in Waco, Texas. Specifically the downtown campus.  Today's message was about finances and the greed that goes along with it; not your typical "praise Jesus" sermon, but one that needs to be heard every once in a while.  It was interesting that this was the message that was delivered today, because recently I'd been caught up in materialistic things. Now, I noticed this and took a very small, almost micro step, in trying to overcome it.  On move-in day, I hand selected clothes that I wore often, and nothing else.  Partly because they wouldn't all fit, but also because I needed to take a step back and see that I CAN survive with x many outfits instead of y. 

Greed.  

Doesn't always have to be about money. 

      The overly used definition of greed affiliates with money, but with broke college students like myself, that is not always the case.  Saving can be greedy.  And I know this like no one's business.  I'm a huge saver.  When it comes to little things like grabbing lunch with a friend, money isn't an issue because I can easily provide for myself.  But when it comes to bigger things like furniture and the next iPhone, I take careful analysis if it is even worth it. Nothing is worth it.  I will never be satisfied with a materialistic item no matter how long I or how much I save.

      One of Baylor's college ministry is called Vertical.  It meets Monday nights, and we are currently studying the book of Ecclesiastes.  In the beginning chapters, Solomon laments all that he's found from "living under the sun" and tells us his analysis of what wealth is like.  He explains that all these earthly things are so temporary, and the pleasure that the IDEA brings is like vapor; so close to your fingertips, but the moment you reach for it, it's gone.  

But it was never there in the first place.

      Wealth is a common misconception for pleasure.  "The more you have, the more you want"a common phrase, especially in our American culture.  But what is vanity? And why, after seeing the suffering that incredibly wealthy people have, do we still desire it so much? Why do we want to be better, be wealthier? 

      That's sin.  That's the feeling, that desire, that stems from living under the sun, and not Living for God.  Living for God doesn't require vanity to impress him.  All that's needed is your heart, and your trust. What the enemy wants is to destroy that, and to give you the desire of things so that you may turn from God and always desire what can't be fulfilling, just to live a life of dissatisfaction.  God wants you to be enveloped in His glory, shielding you from this world.  

      God's always there. 

Which brings me to what happened to me today.

      So, as I was getting into my car at a nearby parking lot, I had this message completely focused in my mind, and turned on the radio.  I wasn't even thinking about what I was doing, but that I was going hammocking with a dear friend in the park soon.  I put my car in drive, and pushed the gas to proceed forward.  I had completely forgotten there was not only one, but two cement parking markers in the way of my car.  I rolled over one, feeling the hard impact it had underneath my car, and decided that I needed to go forward, not thinking there was another cement marker. I pushed extra gas, by car hysterically going over the second marker, thus uprooting it, and like an anchor, being embedded inches from the front of my back tires.  It dragged, not letting go, and I stopped my car. 

      People were around, more than usual because it was Parent's Weekend, but no one came over to help except a man who told me I needed to call a towing service as if I didn't figure that already.  He left. 

      I was all alone, shaking, a million things going through my head, and fearing that I just destroyed my means of transportation. Then, out of nowhere, this couple drove up and climbed out of their car, not even asking if I needed help, but already getting on their knees to inspect the damage and do everything they possibly could to help me. 

I fully believe these people were sent from God.  

      Laura and Dave had just eaten breakfast and were on their way to church for the later service.  Their daughter was studying, so they had the morning to themselves.  They just so happened to pass by on the street that overlooked the parking lot, and instead of passing me, they took the time to pull in, stop, and immediately take action to get me out of my situation.  What did Dave do? He took me step by step in 1. physics and 2. mechanics on how to get the cement marker from under my car.  By doing this, he moved another marker (which was very heavy) to place behind my back tire, and had me back my car up on it, that way we could remove the anchored marker. What was incredible was that the steel rods that connected the marker into my car could have pierced any other area from under neath my car, but managed to fit perfectly in predesigned holes that were part of the car.  Nothing was damaged.  Praise God.  There were no oil or gas leaks, my tires were fine, and because of Laura and Dave, I didn't have to worry about a 2K bill from AAA.  God was with me.  In that little chapter of stupidity, God was looking out for me, and sent Laura and Dave to rescue me in a time of trouble.  

God is so surprising, so marvelous, that I am constantly in awe.  What happened today was no coincidence of mere timing, but a divine intervention.  Some people may declare that insanity, but I call it trust. I trust God with whatever circumstance I find myself in, whether it be hilarious as my uprooting a cement marker from the asphalt, or a personal crisis. God will not let go holding my hand, even if I want Him to, because I am His daughter.  I am so valued, so loved, that He will be with me through everything I go through, and more.  

      As crazy as that event was, I wanted to share it, because I want to share how God is with me every single day, and that even when we feel like we are completely alone, we're not.  Simple as that. 

You are loved. And you are not forgotten. 

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

A Summer and a Future

     School for me starts tomorrow. As the hours continue to tick away, I can only think how much I've changed in the 96 day summer break. In a few short months, I experienced happiness, exhaustion, joy, and the relish of strong, new relationships.  I was a camp counselor, and it completely changed my life. I became a leader to so many kids, a friend to many, and even a girl who became the interest of a boy. Different paths led me to pursue different things: some for the better, and some that became difficult to cope with.  I definitely became a different girl from the one that said goodbye to her freshman year at Baylor. 
     As I trusted those around me this summer, I began to trust the fact that I could be vulnerable without being judged.  This softened my heart and gave me the opportunity to realize that there was good in the world.  Camp became my oasis, my protector.  At camp, what could go wrong?  Relationships could evolve to be family.  Other relationships could thrive romantically. The world and all its problems could not touch the perfect bubble that contained these amazing people.  But then camp ended, and the world became real again.  As I left those gates that claimed Camp Balcones Springs, an immediate sadness filled me, but along with that, joy was present.  Above all, I was so thankful that God brought me to such a place that I was saddened to leave; that is incredible.  
     Not everything thrived as it did at camp in the outside world.  Some relationships became less prominent, while others blossomed into something beautiful. I lost a wonderful guy because I was too caught up in my own issues to put extra effort in the relationship to save it.  I regret it to this day, but I know that there is a purpose to every situation, whether we agree with it or not.  We live by God's timing, and it is our choice whether or not to trust in it.  God will provide.

To listen and trust in God took patience, tears and determination.

     The moment I returned to Waco, I was unsure how the year would unfold.  I returned to the same dorm, now in an apartment, but so much had changed. More than half of my friends moved on, and changes had been made to the building.  I changed personally.  My life plan had changed for sure.  I was no longer pre med, but a business major living amongst pre health students. Some moments got me feeling down about myself and life choices whenever medical school would come up; there was a constant longing and doubt in me concerning if I made the right decision. The semester prior, I'd been praying a lot about my future, and it became prominent that medical school was not in my future.  This was hard to cope with, for my whole life up until college revolved around science and this fantasy of myself in a white lab coat. To listen and trust in God took patience, tears and determination.  My friends supported me, my family questioned me.  My future was in shambles, but God was present through every tribulation. 
     As I prepare myself for Sophomore year, all I can do is thank God for all that He has given me thus far, and pray. A couple friends and I got plugged in to volunteering with Vertical, a college ministry on campus, which has brought strong, faithful relationships that I am beyond excited to see grow. I know that this is His work; He heard my plea for help in strengthening my faith, and this is an answer to many. God is good, and He listens.  I am far from perfect, but God is, and I know that He is with me wherever I go.  He is my protector, and His bountiful love is amazing. 
     For those who are starting school, or a new direction in life, I want you to remember this: first, God will not give you anything you cannot handle. But second, He truly loves you.  What makes His love so beautiful, is that it's not a human love that we can understand.  His love is so pure: you can't do anything in your lifetime that will make Him stop loving you.  He is the ultimate savior, the ultimate sacrifice, and will be with you every step of the way no matter how twisted or dark it gets.  God is the light in all this darkness. Trust in Him, and you will see it.